5 Benefits of Being Vegan

These are 5 benefits of MINE for going vegan. These are not the end-all-be-all full list of reasons to go vegan.

1. A clear conscience. As Franz Kafka said, "I can look at you in peace. I don't eat you anymore."

2. The perfect excuse not to eat nasty food.

3. I'm THE vegan and thus THE expert on veganism. So many people don't know anything about veganism that I could say anything and they'd believe me.

4. Raw cookie dough. Vegan cookie dough isn't dangerous to eat. You're not going to get salmonella from raw eggs because vegans don't eat eggs!

5. Pride in my ability to save lives. Veganism saves lives. And that feels pretty good.